Just Like That

I have a good beginning on a post about Shabbat and was planning on getting it posted today but it seems life has gotten in the way and I can't get my thoughts together to finish it. It will have to wait for another day. That's okay.

So, just like that, we are moving. Another of life's lessons not to take anything for granted because in the blink of an eye your life can change. No worries, nothing serious like a loss of physical life thankfully. However, it's still a loss. Yesterday, we were given an eviction notice for our rented home. We have 3 months to find a new place.

No big deal, right? 3 months is lots of time. Well, one would think so but not in the over-heated housing market in the region where we live. Plus we have all of our animals to consider. That's the hardest part. If it were just hubby and I, no problem. We most likely would quickly pack up and move soon so we could enjoy the summer in a new place. A new adventure! I'm up for that.

When we moved to this area 4 years ago we were extremely fortunate to find this place. Any acreage type rental properties are extremely rare, that meet our needs. The majority of acreages around here are priced above $2000 a month (plus utilities) and do not allow pets, let alone goats.

Our landlords are wonderful people and we have been blessed by the 4 years we have lived here. They have an opportunity in selling this property that would be crazy to pass up so we understand and support their decision but.........where do we go from here?

That is the question of the day, where now? This event, though traumatic, really does have an interesting story behind it as well. I'll try to be concise and share a small portion here.

I have been feeling a "restlessness" in my spirit since the winter, I think about January. It was the same kind of feeling I had for the months prior to us making the decision to move here. I told hubby that I felt like something was going to happen but I hoped I was imagining it because I wasn't ready yet for something big. We were caught up in the excitement with our trip to Israel, youngest daughter moving out and all the ups/downs of life, so this "feeling" got pushed aside. When we returned home from Israel again something didn't "feel" right but I couldn't put my finger on it. I told hubby that maybe our life needed a kickstart and we should do something radical to change it up. I also thought that it was just a "traveller's infatuation" after coming home to real life and it would pass. Until yesterday. We were told yesterday that our landlords have been struggling with their decision regarding the property for several months, since January in fact. Huh, interesting.

So, I guess I got the kickstart but not in the way I had imagined. But what about my much loved caprine friends? And yes, my goats are my friends. They have loved me through thick and thin. They accept me for who I am and love me in spite of all my faults and weaknesses. They don't complain nearly as much as the humans in my life. They listen to me without criticism and provide a connection to the creation that this country girl at heart needs to keep her sanity. They keep me grounded and my perspective balanced. They have taught me innumerable lessons, especially in the area of control. This is a problem area for me, I like to be in control. With animal husbandry (as with farming) you learn over and over again that there are things you cannot control, particularly nature and the weather.

I've said for several years that when the National ID program for goats came into effect in Canada that I would sell my small herd. That is supposed to happen in approx 18 - 24 months. I've also had moments in the past years when dealing with my depression that I contemplated selling. I had always envisioned that the time would come and I would get to the "place" in my heart where I knew it was time to let go and move on, but I wanted it to be my decision and on my terms. I remember now glibbly telling a friend before we left on our trip that maybe I would come back and decide I was selling. We laughed over that comment. I also don't want to invest a lot of money in another property only to come to the decision to part with my goats several months down the road. Hubby thinks I never would have come to a decision to sell on my own so it has to be made for me. sigh Only he really understands how important they are to me and bless his heart, he has spent a lot of his hard earned income on them. So he's probably right.

My goats are purebred, registered dairy goats and I am involved with showing. This provides a very welcome social side of animal husbandry. I've developed many friendships over the years by attending shows and goat related functions. This part of my life would be greatly missed, although I wouldn't miss all the goat hair up my nose and in my mouth from clipping! It never fails to be a windy day when it's time to get ready for a show. I wonder if these friendships could still be maintained without the common experience of owning/breeding/showing goats?

So I'm sitting here with thoughts and emotions churning wildly inside. What now? I know that something new and hopefully exciting is waiting around the corner but the decisions of the present are going to be difficult and even painful. Is it time to part with the critters and move into an urban setting? Can a country girl be happy in the city? What to do.